Step Out of the Boat.

If I’m being honest with myself, after I went to Haiti for the first time I thought I would never go back. I had done it. Crossed “mission trip” off the “good things Christians do” list and planned on moving forward with my life.Yes, the people there had affected my faith and my perspective greatly. Yes, I now gave to organizations like the one I went with who empower those in third-world countries. Yes, the trip had increased my empathy and compassion for those in cycles of poverty.Yes to all that and more. But had Haiti really changed how I lived my life in ways that had a lasting impact? After that first trip, probably not.Then one of my best friends moved there.Now if I wanted to be part of her life in Haiti, I kind of had to do the thing I didn’t think I would do again, i.e. go there. God works in funny ways sometimes, even indirectly.Don’t get me wrong, I’d had a great experience the first time around. I met amazing people, laughed, cried, and experienced God in a whole new way, but have you ever had those experiences or accomplished something that seemed insurmountable and doubted you could do it again? It’s like you were almost glad you didn’t have to do it again? Yep, that was me with Haiti.It wasn’t that going to Haiti was some insurmountable thing. It’s hard, yes, but for me the biggest thing wasn’t that Haiti was hard, it’s that Haiti was uncomfortable.Haiti was stepping out of the boat and not knowing if you’re going to sink beneath the waves or walk on water. It’s the unknown. The opposite of routine. The go-with-the-flow-and-see-what-happens versus let’s plan it all out. This girl is not good at go with the flow.But that’s the whole point. And in the midst of the middle of the night thoughts of “what am I doing?” I knew it, too.Maybe for you stepping out of the boat isn’t going to Haiti. Maybe your boat is security and stepping out means taking a chance—applying for that job, making that phone call, letting someone in. Maybe stepping out of the boat looks like having a hard conversation with a friend, trusting someone enough to be vulnerable, giving of your time and resources when you don’t have much of either to give.We all have our boats—comfort, routine, the way things have always been—the list could go on, but just like Peter on that stormy sea, Jesus calls each of us to take a step out and see where it leads, to trust Him even when it looks like we’re going to sink instead of stand.My step led me to Haiti, on a trip that once again altered my perspective on so many things, but this time I pray it’s lasting. Haiti is part of me now in ways it wasn’t before—in a friend who chases kindergarteners through its classrooms, in future trips, in a possible future kiddo (we’ll see where God takes that one!)—in ways that can’t be clicked through on a camera screen.Stepping out of the boat is always scary. But whatever your boat is, however you choose to take that step, I know He will use it for good.words and photo by Kaylyn Deiter SaveSave